Week 15 power rankings: Rams #18

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Week 15 power rankings
Posted by Mike Florio on December 16, 2014

1. New England Patriots (last week No. 2; 11-3): Tom Brady wants to play “forever,” which roughly equates to the amount of time it takes him to complete a 17-yard run.

2. Seattle Seahawks (No. 3; 10-4): J.J. Watt may be the MVP, and Bobby Wagner may be the defensive player of the year.

3. Denver Broncos (No. 4; 11-3): Peyton Manning throwing a block is roughly as hard to watch as Peyton Manning throwing up.

4. Arizona Cardinals (No. 5; 11-3): As the saying goes, when you have two quarterbacks, you have none; for the Cardinals, when you have no quarterbacks, you have two.

5. Green Bay Packers (No. 1; 10-4): Aaron Rodgers was a little too relaxed in Buffalo.

6. Dallas Cowboys (No. 7; 10-4): They could be the No. 1 seed and they could miss the playoffs. If DeMarco Murray misses Sunday’s game, take the under.

7. Indianapolis Colts (No. 8; 10-4): Squarely on the second tier behind Denver and New England, the Colts won’t be viewed as a real contender until they can beat one of those two teams in the postseason.

8. Detroit Lions (No. 9; 10-4): Everyone keeps waiting for the old Lions to show up. Maybe they won’t.

9. Pittsburgh Steelers (No. 10; 9-5): Good news, the final two games are at home, where they beat the Ravens and Colts. Bad news, the final two games are at home, where they lost to the Bucs and the Saints.

10. Philadelphia Eagles (No. 6; 9-5): Demoralized after a pair of home losses, the Eagles are still only a pair of road wins and a Cowboys stumble away from winning the division.

11. Cincinnati Bengals (No. 11; 9-4-1): Maybe Marvin Lewis should make offensive comments about the upcoming opponent’s quarterback more often.

12. Baltimore Ravens (No. 12; 9-5): Like 2012, they’re finding the gas pedal in December.

13. Kansas City Chiefs (No. 15; 8-6): Great turnaround against Oakland, but it could be too late.

14. Buffalo Bills (No. 17; 8-6): They may not make the playoffs, but that signature win over the Packers could save Doug Marrone’s job.

15. San Diego Chargers (No. 13; 8-6): 0-2 at home against the Patriots and Broncos shows that the Chargers simply can’t compete with the big boys.

16. New Orleans Saints (No. 23; 6-8): The team that can’t win at home suddenly can’t be beaten away from it.

17. Houston Texans (No. 14; 7-7): Maybe J.J. Watt should play quarterback; he can’t be much worse than Thad Lewis or Case Keenum.

18. St. Louis Rams (No. 16; 6-8): Bruce Arians has shown Jeff Fisher how to properly throw shade.

19. Carolina Panthers (No. 22; 5-8-1): When the Panthers host the Browns, the guy who was in a car wreck will be facing the guy who is in a train wreck.

20. Miami Dolphins (No. 18; 7-7): Joe Philbin is on to Minnesota. And folks in Miami are saying, “Don’t come back.”

21. San Francisco 49ers (No. 20; 7-7): After having the last three seasons fall apart in the key moments of a critical postseason game, having it end in December could be a welcome relief.

22. Minnesota Vikings (No. 19; 6-8): The team’s 2014 experience can be summarized by the experience birds will be having at the team’s new glass-walled stadium.

23. Cleveland Browns (No. 21; 7-7): Johnny Goose Egg?

24. New York Giants (No. 25; 5-9): It looks like Tom Coughlin may get a chance to miss the playoffs in six of seven seasons.

25. Atlanta Falcons (No. 24; 5-9): The only good news for the Falcons is that the looming coaching vacancy could be the most attractive job in the upcoming hiring cycle.

26. Chicago Bears (No. 26; 5-9): Thirty years after this team was on the brink of its best season ever, it feels like the Bears could be just one year away from its worst.

27. New York Jets (No. 32; 3-11): Percy Harvin won’t take a pay cut to return. He should want a pay raise to stay in the middle of this mess.

28. Oakland Raiders (No. 27; 2-12): Maybe Derek Carr’s potential will balance out the general dysfunction and crappy stadium in the coaching search.

29. Tampa Bay Buccaneers (No. 28; 2-12): There’s reason for hope in 2015. Especially if this year’s hopelessness results in the first overall pick in the draft.

30. Jacksonville Jaguars (No. 29; 2-12): They remain competitive. At some point, they need to win games.

31. Washington (No. 31; 3-11): Coach Jay Gruden actually seemed to be relieved that they lost by only 11 to the Giants.

32. Tennessee Titans (No. 30; 2-12): The Titans have become the Jaguars without the swimming pools.
 
Anywhere between 15 and 19 sounds about right. Hard to make a case for us being much higher than that, given the discrepancy between offense and defense.
 
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Our record plays into that ranking. We aren't ranked based on potential, or close games.

We are a 6-8 team and he has us ranked accordingly.
 
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Not arguing with our ranking but what does Florio mean by this?

"Bruce Arians has shown Jeff Fisher how to properly throw shade."
 
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Not arguing with our ranking but what does Florio mean by this?

"Bruce Arians has shown Jeff Fisher how to properly throw shade."

It's a good thing you have someone as hip and cool as me here to help you out.

throw shade
to talk trash about a friend or aquaintance, to publicly denounce or disrespect. When throwing shade it's immediately obvious to on-lookers that the thrower, and not the throwee, is the bitcy, uncool one.

"How does Kimmy keep any friends? Last night at the party all she did was throw shade at people."
 
It's a good thing you have someone as hip and cool as me here to help you out.

throw shade
to talk trash about a friend or aquaintance, to publicly denounce or disrespect. When throwing shade it's immediately obvious to on-lookers that the thrower, and not the throwee, is the bitcy, uncool one.

"How does Kimmy keep any friends? Last night at the party all she did was throw shade at people."
So you're saying Arians and Florio have the mentality of a young girl.

I'm good with that.
 
Brucey will be regretting his remarks next season. Fisher may down play them but I would bet that Williams already has them clipped and ready for the bulletin board next year.

I'm hoping that the Rams are 11-3 and the Cardinals are 6-8 when they meet late next year so that Fisher has the opportunity to really rub it in.
 
Not arguing with our ranking but what does Florio mean by this?

"Bruce Arians has shown Jeff Fisher how to properly throw shade."
I'm guessing Florio is still stuck on Fisher's coin toss lineup vs the Redskins being some huge mortal insult, and is basically saying Arians at least came right out with his disrespect rather than be subtle.

But Florio seems to be getting dumber the more I hear from him.
 
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Because he's a fat bastard and he gives off more shade.

Yeah, that was my one and only thought when first reading it, not being "with it" like the rest of you. I normally don't mock someone else's looks but will make an exception in this case. Here he is playing taps on the bagpipes after getting knocked out of the playoffs.

2m5gw7a.jpg
 
Yeah, that was my one and only thought when first reading it, not being "with it" like the rest of you.
I didn't really know what "throwing shade" meant either until I went to Urban Dictionary to find out. At some point, people above a certain age should stop throwing slang around that is becoming introduced into today's vernacular. It just makes you sound whacked, yo.
 
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I didn't really know what "throwing shade" meant either until I went to Urban Dictionary to find out. At some point, people above a certain age should stop throwing slang around that is becoming introduced into today's vernacular. It just makes you sound whacked, yo.
Word.
 
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I didn't really know what "throwing shade" meant either until I went to Urban Dictionary to find out. At some point, people above a certain age should stop throwing slang around that is becoming introduced into today's vernacular. It just makes you sound whacked, yo.

I prefer the Elizabethan version of "playing the dozens" myself, so this is to Bruce Arians because I'm sure he's reading. :sneaky:

You are fat.
By my trowsers, thou dost make the millstone seem as a feather what widst thy lard-bloated footfall!

You've got a big mouth.
In sooth, thy dank cavernous tooth-hole consumes all truth and reason!

You are ugly.
Thy vile canker-blossom'd countenance curdles milk and sours beer.
 
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